A blog about writing . . . and a lot of other things

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

A few of life's mysteries

Here are a few questions on my mind today.  Feel free to respond if you have any theories.

Why do people use tanning beds?  Seriously.  Why?  Tanning causes cancer and makes your skin wrinkled and leathery.  If you overdo it, you end up looking pretty scary.  I just don't get it.

You know those silly web surveys like the ones they have on msn.com every day?  Today it is asking for reader's opinions on some teen's rather tasteless faked suicide.  Your choices are that a) you think her video raises awareness of bullying, b) her project was "unsettling," or c) you have no opinion.  My question: is it really necessary to have an option for people who have no opinion?  Couldn't they simply not participate in the survey?  Where they need a "no opinion" option is on voter's ballots.  I've been known to occasionally do some eenie-meenie-miney-moe.

Aren't they angelic?
Why do children spend so much time and effort driving their parents insane?  Do they enjoy being yelled at?  Get a kick out of punishment?  Like the idea of having crazy parents?  Are they simply addicted to drama?  How can the sweet child who cuddles you before bedtime be the same one who gets called to the principal's office?  A few minutes ago I came stomping out of my room because Mindy was playing the same note over and over and over and over on her ukulele.  She was also singing along (same note) with words something like "Isaac is a big jerk.  I hate Isaac.  Isaac is a stupid head."

Similarly, why do siblings fight so unceasingly?  I'll never forget a lovely game of Risk I played with my husband and two of his cousins back in college.  The cousins were pre-teen siblings, and not once did they attack anyone other than each other.  Jacob and I annihilated them.  It was so easy.  They didn't even notice because they were having such a blast attacking each other.

Why do I get the munchies?  I'm not talking about any side-effects from dope-smoking. I'm talking about when I suddenly am consumed with the insatiable need to eat absolutely everything.  I'm not actually hungry because it's not possible for my pathetic metabolism to require that kind of calorie load.  I'm not eating my feelings because emotionally I feel dandy.  The munchies often hit, oddly, at bedtime.  Usually I crave toast, specifically.  Even better if it is with a mug of hot cocoa.  I rarely get up and have the toast because it won't help.  The need for the toast is bottomless.

Any burning questions on your mind?

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